Monday, February 6, 2017

It's Me Again.

It's been a while, huh? Just a hair over two months since my last post, but in those two months, we've seen a whole new year appear. 2017, you're finally here! I've been waiting for you. Like most, I'm a fan of a new year's approach. In fact, in 2015, I got this awesome lip reading (yes, a lip reading), where the reader casually mentioned that 2017 would be my best year yet. Considering 2016 was a bit on the tougher side, I have been waiting for 2017 to arrive with arms open wider than you can imagine.

So, in the time that I've been gone, what have I been up to? Resetting. I went through a bit of a social media detox where I took a breather and tried to reevaluate my priorities. I think it only lasted a few weeks (which is a long time for a social media junkie such as myself!), but it felt really nice. Before my break, there were too many times in which I felt like I was losing myself and my voice. I was working with brands here and there and by the time December came around, I just wasn't sure anymore if I was posting because I wanted to, or if I was doing it because someone else paid me to (yikes!). While I love working with brands (and am so thankful that I am able to), I always want to make sure that I'm doing it because I love the brand and the message. Since it finally got to a point where I just wasn't sure what my purpose was anymore, I wanted to take a break and reexamine myself and my actions. In conjunction with that, I also really wanted to take time to think about my goals for the new year, drill down to what it was that I wanted to spend my time on, and most importantly, figure out what I needed (not just what I wanted) to make myself truly happy.

So, after all of that, what did I figure out? Well, lots of things and probably more than you really need to know, but in the spirit of being transparent and throwing down some pancake wisdom like the days of before, here's what I learned. Brace yourselves - this post is already a long one.

Well, first, I came to some realizations that lead me to figure out some "resolutions" for the year ahead. The biggest thing I struggled with in 2016 was finding time to do the things that I really wanted to do - the things that made me genuinely happy (like working out, shooting for my blog, writing for my blog, and exploring). I literally could not understand where my time was going, until I realized that I was doing a whole 'lotta things that I just didn't want to do. I realized that at the root of many of my frustrations was my own inability to say "no" when I didn't really want to do something. I'd agree to do too many things that I just didn't really want to do, all because I didn't want someone else to feel bad. But, as a result, I would just make myself feel bad! So, I simply decided, "no more of that." Time is precious. You can't get back the time you spend, so you might as well spend it with the people you want to, doing the things you want to. Ultimately, my resolution was simple - think about myself more (because I just wasn't at all before). And, so that doesn't sound so off-putting, thinking about myself more simply means, asking myself if what I'm about to do is going to really "spark joy." I think I learned that phrase from the Marie Kondo book that I did not read - but there you have it.

These last two months since implementing my resolution, I can honestly say that I feel like myself again. I've been working out close to five days a week (more on that in my next blog post), making time to go on walks on the weekend (something I loved to do, but stopped doing..), and I've even gotten back into shooting for my blog (hence these pretty photos you are now seeing on your screen). It may already be February, but like I always say, better late than never. Very much looking forward to this new year & all of the things it has in store. Shout out to the true homies who still read this ole thing - I appreciate you.


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